Thursday 4 February 2010

10th Blog Post...updates n' shit...

Well, as I write this, there are exactly 6 weeks left. 42 days. 1008 hours (rollin') left until I start the Yak Attack (I've left this draft so long that it's about 39 days...lol, DRAFT, who am I kidding). Due to recent 'events', my 1008 (still rollin') hours are going to be spent divided (more than likely, straight down the middle) between training and watching pornography/Top Gear.

So, how's it all going since the last post? Hmmm, I've had my first haircut since the 'Last of the Mohicans' jobbie that was performed on me. I've trained pretty hard. I've eaten...lots. I've showered enough to guarantee a hosepipe ban for the next 7yrs. I've still got the beard. I've managed to watch the Hurtlocker and Avatar. Twice (probably spent nigh on £45 on that film...f*ck you Titanic and that pervert painter, Leo Di Caprisun). I've still got a job and I may be on TV (surprisingly, not Binge Britain, Crimewatch or Babestation). I've been filmed for S4C where I managed to make a new language up...the interview was primarily in Welsh, but I've managed to make a language that sounds something in-between Afrikaans and retard. Oh, and my chest is bad...again. Fark!

Oh, and I wasted 60mins of my life watching Danny Dyer "on da' farkin' look awt' fur farkin' UFOWs".

I've booked my flights too. Flying with Etihad from London Heathrow (is it London Heathrow or just Heathrow?...balls to it, it's now called Lo-row. Brrrrap) to Abu Dhabi (spelt - Aaaa-Booo Daaa-Beee for those readers with...err...reading issues), then onto Katmandu (spelt - Cat Man Boob).

I'll be leaving (on a jet plane, don't know when I'll be back again (22nd March)) on the 4th of March, so if anyone wants to throw me a leaving doo' with FEMALE strippers and dwarves, then I'm free around for the two weekends prior to this. Merci.

Unless I fall off the bike at 5,500m, I should be back on the 22nd of March where I will be landing in Lo-row before drinking myself into a coma (Binge Britain) for the next couple days.

What else...oh, I got a vain in my (left...?) bicep. Wallop.

Oh, this is Martin Stenmarck (with either a) his girlfriend b) Neil, from the Young Ones c) a disabled man in a tea cup or d) Jesus...either or, we are all in agreement that he has what on can be described as a offensively, filthy doo'). He'll be racing in the Yak. I wonder how many renditions of Abba's Waterloo it will take for him to throw his bike at me (he's Swedish and sang for Sweden in the Euro Vision Song Contest by the way).

Oh, and I cycled 100 miles last weekend. And yes Dan (from North Wales - bless), in ONE go. [rolleyes]
There's probably more I should add...I'll edit when I remember.

Oh, Helicopter rescue is needed in my insurance or I won't be able to race. [shits pants]


I'll write some more next week, and put some photos in for the windowlickers...

Can't be arsed at the mo'.